Approaching & Opening

March 26, 2013

How To Talk To Girls

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Written by: Goku
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Learning how to talk to a girl you like has many benefits. As humans, we were not meant to live alone. This is why learning how to effectively communicate with women is so important. For some, talking to a girl comes naturally. For other guys, however, the thought of randomly approaching a girl and trying to start a conversation is nerve-wracking. I'm here to offer a few tips that should hopefully make things easier.

Your own level of self-confidence will play a role in how easy or hard it is to learn how to make a girl like you. If you have low self-confidence, it will show through when you speak. In this case, I suggest doing some work on your "inner game" before you go out there and start approaching women. The book "Mack Tactics" (just Google it) is an excellent resource for learning how to quickly elevate your self-confidence. You should truly believe that you have something special to offer women, and that girls are interested in what you have to say. If necessary, tell yourself this over and over again.

Here's my next tip for guys who want to know how to flirt: make eye contact with the girl you want to talk to, BEFORE you approach. The "eye contact move" signals to her that you have noticed her, and that she's on your radar. A quick glance is enough. Whatever you do, do not stare. Staring at her will only make her feel uncomfortable, but a quick glance and a smile will make her feel appreciated. Once you have established your interest by making eye contact, wait just a few minutes before going over to talk. You can use this period of time to figure out how you're going to open the conversation, and which topics you can transition onto. If you've read the book "Mack Tactics," you should already have a bunch of conversational routines mapped out. A large portion of learning how to talk to a girl you like revolves around what to say to open the conversation. A simple introduction works best.

As for what to say next, you can choose a topic based on the environment and the situation. You may wish to make a comment about the location you are in, comment on the fact that you noticed her, or if applicable, ask if you can buy her a drink. Basically, say something that would not be considered offensive, silly, or strange. Once you have broken the ice, be sure to ask general questions. This will show that you are indeed interested in getting to know her better. Resist the temptation to interrupt her and start talking about yourself, as this is unattractive. Though many people now put less emphasis on manners, she will notice if you are rude.

In a lot of cases, you'll only have a short amount of time to make a positive impression. If your goal is to hang out with this girl again, you'd better make the most of this time. When she is speaking, make direct eye contact. If you're a "shy guy," I realize this might be difficult for you at first, but it gets easier as you gain more experience talking to girls. Start paying attention to your own body language, and make sure you're not glancing around the room, staring off into the distance, or gazing down at your feet while she talks to you. If you are not looking directly at her while speaking, or being spoken to, this will signal to her that you are not interested. Even though you know that you like her, if your body language says otherwise, the wrong message will be conveyed.

There are a few topics that should be considered off limits. I would put sex at the top of this list. Women want to feel at ease when speaking to a new guy, and sex is a topic that can cause her to feel uncomfortable. Talking about subjects that involve your personal goals, hobbies and ambitions are a much better idea, and by prompting her to share her own thoughts on these topics, you're going to build a connection with her.

And if you want to know how to talk to a girl effectively, here's another tip: keep the conversation moving forward, and into new areas, rather than staying on one topic for a long time. The chapter in the "Mack Tactics" book on "Conversation Control" explains the importance of keeping a conversation flowing into the right areas at all times. This will make you seem more interesting and open, as you may be able to give her a small glimpse into your world. There are very obvious benefits to learning how to talk to a girl you like.

Practice does make perfect, and you may soon find that you can easily approach any girl and start a conversation. Once you have mastered this skill, you may find that forming new relationships is easier than ever before.

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